Joke Quotes, Joke One-Liners, Joke Sayings, Joke Memes, Joke Statuses and Joke Tweets!
I’m a godmother. That’s a great thing to be—a godmother. She calls me God for […]
Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing […]
Yes, reason has been a part of organized religion, ever since two nudists took dietary […]
When all else fails there’s always delusion. Conan O’Brien
Sex is too easy for women to get, and too hard for men. I mean, […]
You know who must be very secure in their masculinity? Male ladybugs. Jay Leno
Somebody just gave me a shower radio. Thanks a lot. Do you really want music […]
I’ve always been into improvisation. Tommy Chong
Bush gave an interview and he said people will vote for him because “They’ve seen […]
It is said that life begins when the fetus can exist apart from its mother. […]
I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap. Rodney Dangerfield
I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it. Groucho Marx
Kids are wonderful, But I like mine barbecued. Bob Hope
Yeah, like Bizarro Superman, Superman’s exact opposite, who lives in the backwards Bizarro world. Up […]
Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the […]
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman ‘Where’s the self-help section?’ She said […]
Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they […]
I agree with my father, Albert Einstein, don’t believe everything you read on the internet. […]
A woman would never make a nuclear bomb. They would never make a weapon that […]
Remember when we used to worry about some weirdo having a razor blade inside an […]
Anybody with a sense of humor is going to put on my album and laugh […]
Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman-or a […]
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was […]
McDonalds released a new video showing how it make their Chicken McNuggets. Apparently it turns […]
I’m not going to vacuum until Sears makes one you can ride on. Roseanne Barr
The reason there are two senators for each state is so one can be the […]
It’s something that’s really fun to do. It’s a family business. Ron White
If I get married again, I want a guy there with a drum to do […]
I get no respect the way my luck is running if I was a politician […]
If you find it hard to laugh at yourself I would be happy to do […]
You can tell how smart people are by what they laugh at. Tina Fey
Audiences are my best friends. You never tire of talking with your best friends. Bob […]
You’re never too old for anything! Betty White
Find the torture you’re comfortable with and you’ll do well. Jerry Seinfeld
Giving birth is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head. Carol […]
In America, anyone can become president. That’s the problem. George Carlin
Reality is a crutch for those who can not cope with drugs. Lily Tomlin
Sweetie, if you’re going to be two faced, at least make one of them pretty. […]
A Christmas tree – the perfect gift for a guy. The plant is already dead. […]